Gentlemen, approaching and getting the number of someone you really want or your crush doesn’t have to be so hard.
You just have to be convincing enough and, well, interesting or just have a ballsy and super confident attitude. Sometimes, I find myself giving my number out to people I normally even wouldn’t look at twice say in a club, not because I feel obligated to, even though to be quite honest sometimes I just feel sorry for the dude, but because the person is simply charming. At the end of the day, it’s one thing to get the number but another to get the person to successfully respond to you. But, just why are some guys good at getting numbers and others are not? I’m talking of a scenario like in the club, forget about the impaired judgement, sometimes you will see a really fine-looking gent and you will actually slide him your business card. If you’re never successful at approaching girls or getting their numbers, here are some tips to keep in mind next time.
1. Look good, have some class.
First things first, if you’re gonna approach a woman looking 'funny' and probably smelling of Konyagi, just know that you have already been rejected even before you talk. Women will always appreciate a well-groomed man. Case in point, do you think any woman in her right mind would ignore Idris Elba if he approached her?...Exactly.
2. For heaven’s sake…do not have halitosis.
There seems to be a major halitosis problem in the 254. I don’t know if people have lung problems, toothpaste has become expensive or guys just can’t get the teeth brushing basics right. So, if you have bad breath please don’t even think of approaching a woman to ask for her number. Keep yourself busy by eating a tic tac or something.
3. Confidence is everything.
Exude confidence, not the cocky kind, but the great kind. However, do not be aggressive…see, confidence is sexy and women love confident men. I always get impressed when a man isn't afraid to approach me and is actually interesting to listen to. The world’s biggest fear is the fear of rejection, we know that and so when we see a man risk it all, that’s kinda sexy.
A compliment, a great joke, ask to borrow a lighter if she’s smoking. While doing it, respect her personal space. For instance, do not lean in too close or start touching her unnecessarily. Remember approaching a woman in a club could end up in two ways, either it goes as planned or you’re rejected.
5. And speaking of rejection, handle it like a boss….
Remember she’s not obligated to talk to you. You’re not Beckham (Pardon me, I have this massive obsession with the Becks). If you’re rejected, respect the decision, take your L and walk away. Guys who start abusing a woman or making comments like “You’re not even that pretty” are such a bore. Urgh.
6. Send over a drink to her table.
Liaise with the waiter and find out what she’s drinking then send her over the drink and then wink when the waiter tells her who bought the drink. Now, this could go two ways, she may be an independent woman who can bankroll herself and finds it an insult when someone randomly buys her a drink, or she may not mind a little spoiling. Still, approach with caution, remember she never asked you for those drinks so buying her the drink does not mean she needs to talk to you. When approaching, remember point number 4.
7. Always assess the situation prior to.
Hey, even when you’re hot and confident, you can’t just walk up to anyone. Assess the situation first, is she alone? With friends? Does she appear to be the friendly kind? Is she a smoker? What kind of drink is she having? You may approach a woman whose man is just on a bathroom break and end up getting your ass whooped when he returns. Also, approaching a woman who is out with friends will mean having to deal with at least one or two cock-blockers. Question is, are you willing to give it a try?
8. When it comes to asking for the number…
If you successfully approach her, now it’s time to hit the jackpot. That’s the tricky part. So you can either ask to take her on a date another time I’m assuming your point number 4 was really on point and here, you could say “Let’s engage more on this over a coffee at your convenience”.
You could also give her your business card, and tell her to “Text you sometime”. Here’s the thing, we humans are easily impressed by status and power. If your business card is impressive in terms of what you do et al, you’re definitely getting a text back.
Ask for her number but not literally, she may say no. Give her your phone instead and have her type it in. Again, back to point number 4, if you didn’t impress her, you’re likely to get a fake number, but it's worth trying!